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Posts Tagged ‘Emotional’

Dear friends, acquaintances and citizens.

I’m going to break FB protocol and add a lengthy status update. The double-edged sword about Social Media today is that it allows us to keep in touch with many people, but it’s format leaves so much to be desired that in topics such as politics we are left to the posting of a link and bound by brevity. It has become the equivalent of running into a crowded conference room, shouting a string of one-sided epithets as if it were a ticking IED (Improvised Explosive Device), then slamming the door and running away.

As we enter this year’s election I make a plea for everyone to remain civil in our attitudes. What good is our democracy if we have to spend the next several years repairing hurt feelings and harsh attitudes at each election? Our lack of trust in each other erodes our ability to stay civil, work together and truly progress.

Politics requires a medium where all sides of issues can be explored or it will only serve to divide. Healthy debate and the challenge of ideas must exist for us to make policy. The first amendment can only serve its purpose when we show restraint and kindness and truly open our minds.

We can disagree without ridicule. We can share a counterpoint without disgust. Humor can be used to relieve tension rather than create it. The mark of true tolerance is being able to share space with a person, with whom you disagree, without feeling fear, offense or that they are the enemy.

Tolerance: The ability or willingness to tolerate something, in particular the existence of opinions or behavior that one does not necessarily agree with.

However we as a people have not showed restraint enough to achieve true tolerance to make progress.

  • Tolerance is not the same as acceptance.
    • Our culture has confused tolerance for acceptance.
      • Acceptance: The action or process of being received as adequate or suitable, typically to be admitted into a group. Agreement with or belief in an idea, opinion, or explanation.
      • Tolerance sits on the opposite end of acceptance. If we are to have any exchange of new ideas, we must embrace tolerance and be clear about the distinction between the two concepts and value them differently.
  • Tolerance must lead to co-existence.
    • In order for us to have productive, happy, healthy communities, we must coexist. We cannot merely live next door to each other with a brewing sense of hostility.
      • Coexistence: a policy of living peacefully with other nations, religions, etc., despite fundamental disagreements.

We call upon all people everywhere to recommit themselves to the time-honored ideals of tolerance and mutual respect.

I sincerely believe that as we acknowledge one another with consideration and compassion we will discover that we can all live peacefully despite different ideologies or interests and despite our deepest differences.

I used to love election years, because it was a time when people stopped worrying more about Beyonce Knowles and focused on issues that really make a difference in our lives. We have lost what it means to have healthy debate. We surround ourselves with people, books and ideas that only support our preconceived notions. Places where we have found acceptance.  We insist on/attempt to categorize others and their viewpoints in terms of “good” and “bad,” “black” and “white.” and pit the opposite into an all-good or all bad judgment.

American politics have always been full of character attacks and salacious headlines. It is time to evolve. If we purport to have kindness and tolerance, we must ensure our attitudes and our hearts reflect it first, before our laws can truly reflect it. Before we can make policy, we must truly understand it, believe it and be able to exemplify it.

The question is “How can we be better than we believe we are, when nothing less will do?”

No matter which leader you have been inspired by all of them promote the ideal that we can rise above our current condition and have hope for the future.

“My fellow Americans, ask not what your country can do for you, ask what you can do for your country.”

-John F. Kennedy

“We must develop and maintain the capacity to forgive. He who is devoid of the power to forgive is devoid of the power to love. There is some good in the worst of us and some evil in the best of us. When we discover this, we are less prone to hate our enemies.”

Martin Luther King, Jr.

“Change will not come if we wait for some other person or some other time. We are the ones we’ve been waiting for. We are the change that we seek.”

Barack Obama

“We can meet in service, in shared moral convictions about our nation stemming from a common worldview.”

Mitt Romney

This election year we can stand for civility.

The only difference in our candidates is HOW they propose to effect change. One statement or stance does not make them a socialist, a woman-hater, a bigot, or a tyrant.

I would like to restore the definition of hate back to its former glory. Hate: (v) Feel intense or passionate dislike for (someone). (n) Intense or passionate dislike.

Not supporting a certain cause does not imply hate or a judgment about the opposite. It implies support for a preferred resolution over another. Hate is an emotion, which is completely controllable. Can you disagree with someone and not hate him or her? Of course. However the propaganda today would have you believe this is not so. How do you disagree with someone and still love and respect him or her? Mislabeling someone’s proposition for change in a different way than you would suggest as hate only exposes weakness of heart & emotional immaturity. It will render us powerless in the long run.

Taking offense at the prosperity of another only shows a weakness of heart and mind, which will render you powerless.

I make a call to all journalists to raise the bar of integrity of reporting. Retractions & miscued reporting should be treated with the same import as the original article. If there is a headline that is found to be misleading, inaccurate or untrue, you should reprint the retraction as a headline. The small note from the editor in small print on the inside cover does not repair or redeem your credibility. Glenn Beck, Rachel Maddow, Lawrence O’Donnell, Sean Hannity, I don’t care about your opinions just give me the facts. And BTW folks as much as I love John Stewart and Stephen Colbert they are comedians. They exploit situations for the profit of laughing. It’s not real news.

The mark of the greatness of our country is the peaceful transfer of power. I’ve had the privilege to attend the inauguration of two of our presidents. This one sacred event is a powerful example of how civility marks our nation’s attitude.

For most part of my life I have lived in places where ideologically I am a minority. Even as a white, heterosexual, male I have felt the pangs of discrimination. Ridiculed for beliefs, without proper foresight and feared for my well being if I were to publicly express my own opinion. We must all have the courage to be able to express our opinions without fear. A community that ensures that safety is the true mark what tolerance can do for us. It is true freedom, rather than following the rhetoric of groupthink as we have today.

News flash: we do not live in democracy. We do not vote for the president the same way we “Like” a Facebook post, vote for American Idol or Reddit threads.We live in a Democratic Federalist Republic. By design we have checks and balances for the wisdom of restraint. (Here some reference links. Democracy, Federalism, Republic)

We cannot afford to make assumptions:
Let’s all read the Constitution, Bill of Rights, All the amendments. Let’s study political & social history. Let’s study how read the results of a scientific study. Let’s listen more than we talk so that we can discover truth together.

I learned long ago that when you accuse someone/thing incorrectly without all the information you’re exposing to people much more about your own heart than theirs, even if they are making mistakes. And for those who think the reversal is too late? Well if we have no room in our society for forgiveness than we have no real hope for progress.

“If there are dreams about a beautiful South Africa, there are also roads that lead to their goal. Two of these roads could be named Goodness and Forgiveness.”

-Nelson Mandela

Before you make an accusation, verify the facts, dig deeper, truly put yourself in the others shoes and try to understand why they might feel that is a good solution. Do not vilify others.

This is our greatest hour, and the world is watching. Our greatest testament of the power of who we are is the peaceful transfer of power.

From my liberal friends in Wisconsin to my conservative friends in Utah to all my friends on the coasts, we can be united in purpose and service. Recognize each other’s efforts as efforts. Accept the good in people and see their flaws as just that. Flaws. No one is perfect, but we would be remiss to throw the baby out with the bathwater just because we don’t agree with someone’s point of view.

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I’ve written no less than 25 partial posts that are sitting as drafts in my dashboard, which I mean to publish someday, since they seem very relevant to the time period right now. But I found this video and it just spoke to my heart. Whether it’s because I love France, Ingenuity, Innovation and “Off the Beaten Path” ideas or otherwise I don’t know.

Enjoy.

Maybe it will inspire me to finish the rest of my oh – so important posts… 🙂

Addendum: Yet another great inspiration.

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  1. Steve Jobs steps down
  2. Twitter feeds from Apple Employees about Steve’s departure.
  3. kenchangKen Chang  ‘ Just watched Tim Cook’s 2010 Auburn University Commencement Speech… and then I saw this… bit.ly/p2us3J (Will Ferrell, Harvard, 2003)
  4. Conan O’Brien’s  2011 Dartmouth Commencement Address

[21:31]”…No specific job or career goal defines me. And it should not define you.”

[20:52]”..It is our failure to become our perceived ideal, that ultimately defines us and makes us unique. It’s not easy, but if you accept your misfortune and handle it right. Your perceived failure can become a catalyst for profound reinvention.”

[21:52]  “In 2000 I told graduates to not be afraid to fail. And I still believe that. But today I tell you that weather you fear it or not disappointment will come. The beauty is that through disappointment you can gain clarity and with clarity comes conviction and true originality.”

[23:20] “Work Hard. Be Kind and amazing things will happen.”

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You know you are blessed when little gems like this occur in your day.

Check out the people LinkedIn suggested I might know today:

People you May Know

Hack, Spam or otherwise. This made me laugh!

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http://lifehacker.com/5543914/do-not-covet-your-ideas

“It’s easy to understand why you’d want to safeguard every idea you have, but it’s probably not the best way to get things done. Motivational author Paul Arden suggests you’re a lot better off freeing your ideas, and staying hungry for new ones.”

LifeHacker.com

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I’ve recently been acutely awakened to the fact that our modes of communication have a very bad side effect as illustrated in this comment by my good friend Rachel.

“If it can’t be understood in a 30 second sound byte America doesn’t get it.”

I am indeed guilty of such brevity in many ways. Every twitter feed, status and mini-post I make can be recalled as only a small sound byte in the full orchestral movement that is my life.

This actually limits my freedom. My freedom of speech in a way. It limits my ability to fully address all issues that have a sense of gravity in life, because nothing that is important is without debate and complexity. The “brevity bias” as I will call it, is sensational and appeals to a visceral reaction. It doesn’t allow for all the facts to be brought to the table. It is not patient, it is not humble, and it is not forgiving. The brevity bias is not forgiving because  it breaks each statement into it’s one full and complete statement without giving ear to context which is everything when understanding statements of power. It suppresses our ability to truly communicate and be understand only giving clues to the audience giving them control to interpret based on their own context.  It also limits my topics. Wanting to be fully understood and understand other points of view, I avoid topics of controversy knowing that and sound byte of info is not enough to give respect to important topics. So if I do know find an outlet that allows me this freedom, I in fact bind myself via my modes of communication.

I fully admit that these forms of communication have a place in our arsenal of communication, but they must augment it as a piece in the puzzle rather than drive it. For someone who spends a lot of time in the social media world this can be difficult to find the right place for it. Recently in his address to the 2010 graduating class of the University of Iowa Tom Brokaw made this statement. “It will do us little good to wire the world if we short circuit our souls. And you should not surrender the essence of the human experience to 146 characters on Twitter or a Facebook page however cleverly designed it may appear to be. No text message will ever replace the first kiss. No keyboard will ever take the place of someone you love nor will it spell out for you just what love is. That irreplaceable condition of the human experience.”

My hope is that we’ll find the patience to think before we act based on a well informed position  so we can act with civility, rather than viscerally.

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This was no doubt the best film of the whole series, with a central message no one can argue with.

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